You know at 38 years of age I thought I had seen and done pretty much everything I was going to do and I was beginning to settle nicely into a rut in my endless march towards death. Sure I knew there would be variations on a theme, but I was pretty much expecting to be prepared for all life had in store for me - with the obvious exception of the big step off. How wrong I was.
You see our toddler isn’t toilet trained yet - no big deal there as we haven’t even tried  to train her and she doesn’t seem particularly interested, besides with everything else she has just decided when the time is write and done it all herself with little help from us at all. Boy that is a long lead in.
Anyway there we were in the shower - she has taken to only showering with Daddy and only if I hold her in my arms the whole time we are in the shower. It has probably been brought about by her recent illness and me being the primary caregiver since my wife has the newborn to look after - but again I digress.
To cut a long story short tonight I was shit on by my own flesh and blood - and not a little bit of baby poo which is almost cute, but a proper gastro tinged toddler poo on both arms. To top it off I had to pretend it was no big deal so as to not upset my daughter - she is such a delicate thing after all.
My only consolation in all this is that there will come a time when I am old and senile and she will have to change my nappies and I will get to crap on her…

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